Ramadan 2013

The reason for being absent from my blog since the past month has been Ramadan. The whole schedule has been quite off, and I have often used my baby-free-writing-time to make up for my disturbed sleep.
I have always welcomed and enjoyed Ramadan and had vowed to write something about it at the start of the holy month, but this Ramadan was not very easy on me.
Unfortunately, Ramadan this year coincided with the very hot summers in Netherlands. As the temperatures soared and people enjoyed the sun to the fullest, we Muslims found ourselves at a loss of ideas on how to combat the summer heat while fasting.
Fasting hours were from 3am till 10pm. Surprisingly, to manage 19 hours without food is not as a big deal as it sounds, but to manage all this time without a sip of water can be hard in this heat.
The most challenging part for me in this Ramadan has been to combat my boredom. If I planned to go out, I was afraid of getting too tired or too thirsty. If I stayed home instead, Mr Baby and I both got exhausted by boredom.
For the first few days I managed to overcome my boredom by thinking about what to make for Iftar and then spending the last three hours of the day in the kitchen preparing some yummy delicacies.
However, after the 20th of Ramadan I felt my taste buds had died a bit. Other fasting colleagues have also agreed to this dilemma. We really don't feel like eating anything.
The coming years of Ramadan will be the same or harder. Tempers have risen, and patience has drowned taking along the essence of this month with it. It is not just about leaving food and drink, but about getting close to our spiritual self.
May God forgive us for our negligence and reward us for the little that we have done. Ameen.

Eid is here!

Its the last day of Ramadan today and I couldn't be more excited. Not just because tomorrow I will not have to fast, but also because tomorrow is Eid!
I have always loved Eid and celebrated it with much fervor and zeal, but this Eid is extra special, because it is Mr Baby's first Eid!
Coincidentally, this Eid falls on a hot day in Amsterdam, where the temperature is expected to raise up to 30 degrees! That is really hot for Netherlands. Trams and metros become extremely suffocating, buses however, are air-conditioned.
Considering this hot weather I went to buy some special summer clothes for Mr Baby. To my dismay, all the summer stock has finished, even the ones on sale. Maybe the Netherlanders were not expecting to have such a long summer this time, or maybe everyone just bought the summer stuff early on.
I already had a nice shirt for Mr Baby from Zara, which I originally thought he could wear with pants and shoes, but now I was looking for shorts and sandals. For sandals I went to Crocs, but the only shoes they had in Mr Baby's size were pink! Hush Puppies were too expensive, H&M only had brown. Finally I ventured into Zara and found nice looking sandals and affordable too, but they were either too small or too big. I bought the too big one. Mr Baby doesn't walk yet, so the shoes are just an accessory rather than a necessity. However, he does look like he has enormous feet in these sandals.
For shorts, I went through a similar dilemma. The only few places that were selling shorts were either not the right size or not the right color to go with Mr Baby's shirt. Finally, I walked into V&D but in their sale rack I found a pair of shorts which didn't look too bad with the shirt.
Atleast I had some clothes now, but I wasn't really satisfied. I showed them to S who liked them and that gave me a little contentment.
S and I are both very excited to give Mr Baby his Eid presents. I bought a ring stacking toy for him, and S got him a drum set. I can't wait for tomorrow to see my baby dressed in his clothes and playing his Eid presents!
Happy Eid everyone!

Inner peace

I have realised that Ramadan does bring out the best in me. I have been reintroduced to the timid and submissive side of me again. The side that I am most comfortable being. I have tried standing up, making my voice heard, fighting for my rights, but I find it all very exhausting and stressful. And if I just start ignoring things that disturb me and maintain a positive attitude towards life, I feel light, happier and to a larger extent satisfied.
I owe this inner peace to this spiritual month, and hope that the change Ramadan has brought in my personality is permanent and not just for this month.
It also makes my belief stronger in the saying that in Ramadan satan is caged. Surely, it is satan's will to see us disturbed and quarelling with our loved ones. And once he is out of sight we find that there is nothing more important than love in life and relationships.

Ramadan 2012

This is going to be my second Ramadan in Amsterdam, but the first one that I am actually going to observe.
Last year because of my pregnancy I avoided the long fasts and paid fidya instead. Fidya is the money you pay someone else to fast in case you are unable to do so because of sickness or travel. Pregnant and nursing women are also allowed to do this.
This year I was also sceptical about whether I would be able to observe the 18 hours long fasts while breastfeeding my baby. However, I decided I would give it a try.
By the grace of God, yesterday the first Ramadan passed without any difficulty. I carried on with all my daily tasks, nursed my baby and just felt a normal amoount of thirst and tiredness.
This made me realise that fasting in Ramadan is a special thing. If in any other month I would be hugry for even a few hours my head would start hurting and I would feel like I am going to dye of hunger. But in this Holy month, Allah gives us the strength to be hungry and thirsty for the whole day. Our energy for this month does not come through food, rather prayer and faith acts as a fuel for our bodies and souls in Ramadan.
I am excited that this year I would be able to keep all my fasts. Inshallah!