My son, my friend

Moving to a new city and not speaking the language can seem like a daunting way to undertake a new beginning. For this Amsterdam Mama, learning the language and becoming pregnant opened up a new perspective on life in Amsterdam.

http://www.amsterdam-mamas.nl/stories/this-month/my-son-my-friend

As romantic as we may think of or imagine newly married life, it is not free from challenges. Challenges of adjustment, compromise and making a new start in general. When I got married I was met with the challenge of not only adjusting with a new person, but also with a totally new lifestyle in another part of the world. I had no friends there, and I felt that no one could truly understand how I felt.

Later, when I did manage to create a small life of my own there, a job, some friends with whom I would occasionally meet up or just keep in touch, I found myself saying goodbye to this country as well and landing in Amsterdam.

I never imagined living in a country where I didn’t even speak the language. For my first week here with zero knowledge of Dutch I felt deaf, dumb and blind. Learning the language was an essential for me. I always wanted to learn a new language anyways and this was the perfect scenario.

Things started to become easier as I joined my language school. I was meeting people regularly, and also learning and exploring new things every day. Amsterdam is beautiful and I enjoyed walking through this new city.

Still, my only friend was my solitude, until one day when I discovered there was a life growing inside me. From that day onwards I stopped feeling alone. Even when I walked alone I felt my baby walking with me. He was with me all the time, even while I slept. I looked forward to my baby being born. I remember once in an upset mood I was walking in a beautiful Amsterdam park when the thought of my baby made me smile. At that time I had thought that soon I will have a companion to share these walks with, a friend to talk to.

Now, with my toddler, I see my dreams coming true. We talk, we play, we go out and share every moment of our lives together. I enjoy going to cafes with him, put him in a high chair and we eat together, mother and son. We go to the park together, whether he is in his buggy or on foot, he is still with me.

Having a baby also magically increased my social circle. It introduced me to the wonderful community of Amsterdam Mamas, wherever everyone looks out for each other like a devoted family member.

Also after having this baby I felt better connected with my husband. My sparkling clean house feels like a messy home now and I love the feeling of graduating from a couple to a family.

I thank my God every day for blessing me with this baby, who has taken away my depression and made me complete. He adores me so much at this stage and sticks to me like a shadow, but I know it is not going to be like this forever. As he grows he will need his space. Still, I hope that we share a friendly and beautiful relationship forever. I imagine my son being my best friend in times to come and that is the best feeling ever.